It was determined that I should make another assault on the beach and the residents there of. I being a
loyal soldier and feeling the sting of near defeat in the last battle readily agreed. Knowing better the
rigors I could possibly be facing, I planned this assault with much enthusiasm, all be it some
intrepidation. First, I would need some troops to make this assault. Bashoy Raub ("Large Slave Boy"
My sons nickname since he has grown so big) was my first thought, but would he consent to make
another perilous attempt? He would come if he knew what was good for him. We would need another
driver because my better half, although enthusiastically pushing me out the door at the thought of more
tasty clams in the frying pan, declined to make the trip with me. Who did I know that would make this
trip? Possibly the "Vitailsorus" would come? He, seemingly not as smart as his grades would say, also
agreed to make the trip. My team was now set. I must determine the equipment needed for a successful
trip.
The correct weapons could turn the tide in any battle. The "Viltalisorus" said he had access to an arms
dealer, namely his neighbor, who could provide these weapons. Being that this was an ill financed
expedition, I consented. The weapons he attained seemed adequate and we moved on to more planning.
Surprise is also very important and so we planned to leave very early so our battle would start while the
enemy was still sleeping. Also that was when the tide would be at it's lowest and would give us the
greatest access to our enemy. Luckily the price of petrol was down and the distance not so great as last
time. "Bashoy Raub" was assigned to monitor the weather so that our expedition would be prepared for
anything. His reports were favorable. Clear skies were forecast and all was looking good. The one
drawback was that with this clear weather there would also be cold temperatures. Poor handling of the
weapons could be the result of this cold.
All members were told of the conditions that we expected to be facing, and told to plan accordingly.
"Bashoy Raub" packed all he had in the way of foul weather gear and I was afraid that we would not be
able to take it all. My fears were lessened when "The Vitalasorus" showed up the morning of our
departure with virtually nothing with him. It was hoped that he had very thick skin because he was
going to need it to survive. Also the ride home would be much more comfortable with a change of
clothing, but he did not listen to the reports. I being the commander of this mission knowing all that we
would be facing was outfitted well. Chest waders were the main armament I would have along. The cold
waters of the "Pacific Ocean" would not have their way with me.
The alarm rang and woke me up as though I had been struck with lightning. I flew from the bed and
dressed quickly. It was later related to me that it sounded like a herd of elephants getting ready to go on
a rampage as "Bashoy Raub" and I were getting ready that morning. This person also claimed that a
profuse amount of dirt was left on the carpet for her to clean in the morning. Not knowing where this dirt
could possibly have come from, I suggested that maybe she had been sleep walking in the garden after
we left and had been responsible for the dirt. The strange and scary look I received suggested to me
that this line of response, although entirely possible, was best not pursued. I then, in a submissive voice
and attitude, suggested that the elephants would be more careful next time.
"The Viltalisorus" arrived on time and we were on our way. First stop was to fuel up and this was done
at a local all night establishment. The gas is cheap there and there are many things there to keep the
expeditionier and his army happy. Thus supplied we again were on the road. It was not long before my
troops abandoned me for some sleep. Just before this they had been trying to tell what direction I was
going by looking at the stars. There were many stars out this night and this must have confused them
for they quickly became silent and the sleep followed.
On through the night our red chariot carried us to an uncertain future. Then the stars disappeared and
we were in some thick fog. "Bashoy Raubs" reports had not mentioned this and I thought to tell him to
be more thorough next time. It did not last long and thus my chastisement would not be forth coming.
"Bashoy Raub" had dodged a scolding and did not even know it due to the pleasures of sleep. Few
cars or trucks were on the road this early morning and our progress was steady. The smell of salt and of
course the sign stating "Ocean Beaches ahead" foretold of our arrival at our destination.
My troops awakened and prepared for battle. Preparation for me was much more difficult than for my
troops. For the comfort I would receive from the waders, I had to pay dearly in getting them on.
Undaunted we all were soon ready and quickly headed for the only light visible near the water.
Some people were already assaulting the enemy. For awhile, all we could do was watch them because
there had been a lapse in our planning process. The sun would not be giving off enough light to see by
for another half-hour and we had not brought a lantern. Being that we all had shared in the
responsibility of supplying the expedition, I decided not to press my dissatisfaction with the troops.
Soon we were attacking the enemy with much joy. It was not long before we were taking prisoners. The
weather was warm enough that I had to remove my coat. There was no where to put this coat and none
of the troops could be ordered or politely asked or threatened to take it back to the truck, so I had to do it
myself. As 1 was walking back I knew I had much more training to do with this mutinous crew I had
along with me. On my return from the truck, where I was assaulted by a very upset dog, (we had
brought Littlefoot, my bird dog along, and he thought he could find clams just as well as birds and let me
know this) I found that "The Vitalasorus" & "Bashoy Raub" were vastly ahead of me in their pursuit of
the vaunted limit. I renewed my assault with much energy, not wanting to hear all the way home how the
troops had beaten me to the first limit.
Then disaster struck. One of the shovels broke. We continued on but it was not so easy to dig with this
shovel. In the true nature of comrades in arms we took to sharing the last two good devices. All three
limits were attained and no bickering could be heard about who had dug the most clams. Of course we
all knew that I as the commander had won this contest but I decided not to demoralize the troops with
this unrelenting fact for more than half way home.
Leaving the scene of this battle we came upon a troop carrier that had been mired in the loose sand.
This was not to surprising being that it was just a civilian troop carrier (2-wheel drive). We endeavored to
get him out and finally succeeded with the loan of a tow rope from some others who happened on the
scene. Good-byes were said as we went our separate ways.
A call was made when we were back-in the real world ("real world" = within range of a cell site) to inform
the high commander of our success. Somehow I mis-spoke and told a story about our lack of success.
The high commander was very disappointed and stated she would think up an appropriate punishment.
Knowing the errors of my ways I informed her of the truth and was told the punishment would be even
more sever. It was at this time that I was told of the elephant story. Fearing retribution and the possible
lack on the part of the high commander to feed us on our return home, we stopped at a burger stand for
39 cent cheeseburgers and a planning session on what to do next. Even the crazed dog in the back
enjoyed a cup of water and a cheeseburger. Fully stuffed with these burgers we headed home for
whatever punishment awaited us.
The high commander was very cheerful at the sight of the large bag of clams and seemed to have
forgotten about all the earlier threats. "The Vitalisorus" gathered his belongings and his share of clams
and departed for home. I believed he feared the high commander might remember the threats. "Bashoy
Raub" showered while I started cleaning the clams. He was soon asleep on the couch, while I on the
other hand, was cleaning the clams for about one hour and was very glad that when at last I was done.
The high commander during this time had fried some of the cleaned clams and pronounced them "tasty."
loyal soldier and feeling the sting of near defeat in the last battle readily agreed. Knowing better the
rigors I could possibly be facing, I planned this assault with much enthusiasm, all be it some
intrepidation. First, I would need some troops to make this assault. Bashoy Raub ("Large Slave Boy"
My sons nickname since he has grown so big) was my first thought, but would he consent to make
another perilous attempt? He would come if he knew what was good for him. We would need another
driver because my better half, although enthusiastically pushing me out the door at the thought of more
tasty clams in the frying pan, declined to make the trip with me. Who did I know that would make this
trip? Possibly the "Vitailsorus" would come? He, seemingly not as smart as his grades would say, also
agreed to make the trip. My team was now set. I must determine the equipment needed for a successful
trip.
The correct weapons could turn the tide in any battle. The "Viltalisorus" said he had access to an arms
dealer, namely his neighbor, who could provide these weapons. Being that this was an ill financed
expedition, I consented. The weapons he attained seemed adequate and we moved on to more planning.
Surprise is also very important and so we planned to leave very early so our battle would start while the
enemy was still sleeping. Also that was when the tide would be at it's lowest and would give us the
greatest access to our enemy. Luckily the price of petrol was down and the distance not so great as last
time. "Bashoy Raub" was assigned to monitor the weather so that our expedition would be prepared for
anything. His reports were favorable. Clear skies were forecast and all was looking good. The one
drawback was that with this clear weather there would also be cold temperatures. Poor handling of the
weapons could be the result of this cold.
All members were told of the conditions that we expected to be facing, and told to plan accordingly.
"Bashoy Raub" packed all he had in the way of foul weather gear and I was afraid that we would not be
able to take it all. My fears were lessened when "The Vitalasorus" showed up the morning of our
departure with virtually nothing with him. It was hoped that he had very thick skin because he was
going to need it to survive. Also the ride home would be much more comfortable with a change of
clothing, but he did not listen to the reports. I being the commander of this mission knowing all that we
would be facing was outfitted well. Chest waders were the main armament I would have along. The cold
waters of the "Pacific Ocean" would not have their way with me.
The alarm rang and woke me up as though I had been struck with lightning. I flew from the bed and
dressed quickly. It was later related to me that it sounded like a herd of elephants getting ready to go on
a rampage as "Bashoy Raub" and I were getting ready that morning. This person also claimed that a
profuse amount of dirt was left on the carpet for her to clean in the morning. Not knowing where this dirt
could possibly have come from, I suggested that maybe she had been sleep walking in the garden after
we left and had been responsible for the dirt. The strange and scary look I received suggested to me
that this line of response, although entirely possible, was best not pursued. I then, in a submissive voice
and attitude, suggested that the elephants would be more careful next time.
"The Viltalisorus" arrived on time and we were on our way. First stop was to fuel up and this was done
at a local all night establishment. The gas is cheap there and there are many things there to keep the
expeditionier and his army happy. Thus supplied we again were on the road. It was not long before my
troops abandoned me for some sleep. Just before this they had been trying to tell what direction I was
going by looking at the stars. There were many stars out this night and this must have confused them
for they quickly became silent and the sleep followed.
On through the night our red chariot carried us to an uncertain future. Then the stars disappeared and
we were in some thick fog. "Bashoy Raubs" reports had not mentioned this and I thought to tell him to
be more thorough next time. It did not last long and thus my chastisement would not be forth coming.
"Bashoy Raub" had dodged a scolding and did not even know it due to the pleasures of sleep. Few
cars or trucks were on the road this early morning and our progress was steady. The smell of salt and of
course the sign stating "Ocean Beaches ahead" foretold of our arrival at our destination.
My troops awakened and prepared for battle. Preparation for me was much more difficult than for my
troops. For the comfort I would receive from the waders, I had to pay dearly in getting them on.
Undaunted we all were soon ready and quickly headed for the only light visible near the water.
Some people were already assaulting the enemy. For awhile, all we could do was watch them because
there had been a lapse in our planning process. The sun would not be giving off enough light to see by
for another half-hour and we had not brought a lantern. Being that we all had shared in the
responsibility of supplying the expedition, I decided not to press my dissatisfaction with the troops.
Soon we were attacking the enemy with much joy. It was not long before we were taking prisoners. The
weather was warm enough that I had to remove my coat. There was no where to put this coat and none
of the troops could be ordered or politely asked or threatened to take it back to the truck, so I had to do it
myself. As 1 was walking back I knew I had much more training to do with this mutinous crew I had
along with me. On my return from the truck, where I was assaulted by a very upset dog, (we had
brought Littlefoot, my bird dog along, and he thought he could find clams just as well as birds and let me
know this) I found that "The Vitalasorus" & "Bashoy Raub" were vastly ahead of me in their pursuit of
the vaunted limit. I renewed my assault with much energy, not wanting to hear all the way home how the
troops had beaten me to the first limit.
Then disaster struck. One of the shovels broke. We continued on but it was not so easy to dig with this
shovel. In the true nature of comrades in arms we took to sharing the last two good devices. All three
limits were attained and no bickering could be heard about who had dug the most clams. Of course we
all knew that I as the commander had won this contest but I decided not to demoralize the troops with
this unrelenting fact for more than half way home.
Leaving the scene of this battle we came upon a troop carrier that had been mired in the loose sand.
This was not to surprising being that it was just a civilian troop carrier (2-wheel drive). We endeavored to
get him out and finally succeeded with the loan of a tow rope from some others who happened on the
scene. Good-byes were said as we went our separate ways.
A call was made when we were back-in the real world ("real world" = within range of a cell site) to inform
the high commander of our success. Somehow I mis-spoke and told a story about our lack of success.
The high commander was very disappointed and stated she would think up an appropriate punishment.
Knowing the errors of my ways I informed her of the truth and was told the punishment would be even
more sever. It was at this time that I was told of the elephant story. Fearing retribution and the possible
lack on the part of the high commander to feed us on our return home, we stopped at a burger stand for
39 cent cheeseburgers and a planning session on what to do next. Even the crazed dog in the back
enjoyed a cup of water and a cheeseburger. Fully stuffed with these burgers we headed home for
whatever punishment awaited us.
The high commander was very cheerful at the sight of the large bag of clams and seemed to have
forgotten about all the earlier threats. "The Vitalisorus" gathered his belongings and his share of clams
and departed for home. I believed he feared the high commander might remember the threats. "Bashoy
Raub" showered while I started cleaning the clams. He was soon asleep on the couch, while I on the
other hand, was cleaning the clams for about one hour and was very glad that when at last I was done.
The high commander during this time had fried some of the cleaned clams and pronounced them "tasty."
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Clam Chowder Two